Pharaoh A New Era review: the venerable city builder king has never looked better

Pharaoh came out in 1999, almost 25 years ago. It was one of that era’s City Building series that included Zeus and all of the Caesars, a run of games so good that they earned the capital letters. Pharaoh also happens to be one of my foundational video games, and I played it when I was knee-high to my big brother’s desk, at a time when family homes had one (1) yellow-grey computer with a CRT screen. And now it’s back, baby.

Pharaoh: A New Era means I can play that game of my childhood on my shiny black RGB-lit bastard. Honestly though, the “A New Era” part is a bit much. Sure, the updated graphics are fabulous and the quality of life changes mean it plays like smooth peanut butter to the 90s’ extra crunchy. It’s a good remake of a solid game, but the mummy in the casket is fundamentally the same.

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Before We Leave devs next chill city builder is set on top of a giant space whale

Before We Leave was a chill, planet-hopping city builder with the occasional space whale who might hoover up your world’s hexagonal tiles. Now developer Balancing Monkey is back for another go at spacefaring management, but this time your city is built on top of a space whale, rather than being terrorised by one. Their follow-up, Beyond These Stars, will be hitting early access on PC later this year.

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Blanc review: heartwarming co-op, but its weak second half leaves you out in the cold

Blanc looks like it’s going to be a lot lighter than games like Endling: Extinction is Forever and the notoriously upsetting Shelter series at first glance, but I’ve learned to never let my guard down around these kinds of games. Those cute art styles are almost always a front for a brutal sneak attack on your emotions.

Blanc is very much aiming for your heartstrings with its adorable animal duo and picturesque snowy landscapes. The first half teases massive potential for a cutesy story with fun puzzle antics, but the game is majorly let down by a repetitive and often frustrating second half and lacklustre ending. After the promise of a warm, cosy adventure, I watched the end credits roll and couldn’t help feeling like I’d been left out in the cold.

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I’m learning how to curse exes and talk to the dead in So May It Be

RPS Magic Week, but I wanna learn how to actually be a witch, you know? I wanna learn the witchy ways, and not just from some not-so-well informed TikToks.

Thankfully, So May It Be has been my gateway to Witchcraft 101. It’s a sapphic dating sim about a bunch of witches just hanging out doing witchy things. You’re part of a small coven with your three friends, and you all meet online every night to chat about school, shitty part-time jobs, and of course, witchcraft. At the end of each evening, you can privately ask one of your friends to hang out the next day 1 on 1, getting to know them better and just doing cool witch shit.

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Campo Santo’s In The Valley Of Gods has a probably meaningless 2029 release date

Firewatch devs announced their tomb-raiding adventure, In The Valley Of Gods, and in that time the idea of the game itself has fossilised. The first-person archaeology game was put on hold in 2019 after Valve acquired Campo Santo and had them support other Valve projects like Half-Life: Alyx. Now Campo’s in-limbo game has a December 2029 listing on Steam, which almost certainly means nothing, but it’s fun to dust off some memories.

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Loverwatch is a cringe Overwatch dating sim, and I want more

Overwatch 2’s third season is well underway, adding more of the usual maps, modes, and cosmetics. The big surprise this season is the Valentine’s themed Loverwatch, a non-canon text adventure that allows you to court either Mercy or Genji. Naturally, I chose to date Genji (described as Overwatch’s “bad boy”), and the results were surprising. It’s cringe-y and occasionally grating, but it’s also surprisingly charming and stuffed with referential humour that OW fans will surely love.

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